Self-reflection is an essential skill that kids and adults alike can rely on no matter the day.

It is particularly important in children, as it can help them develop other skills they need to navigate the challenges of growing up and becoming responsible adults.

Children may use self-reflection to question the world around them, help explain past events and display gratitude towards the people closest to them. And best of all, it is a skill that can be used everywhere, not just in your home or classroom. 

How self-reflection can guide children

Self-reflection affects children in several ways but today we will specifically talk about 3 ways: academically, socially, and emotionally. 

Learning

It is argued in the 2008 paper Self-Reflection and the Cognitive Control of Behavior: Implications for Learning that self-reflection helps make executive function possible. Executive function, as is being used here, is simply defined as mental skills that help a person complete a task. 

Examples of executive functions include emotional control, adaptability, task initiation, organization, time management, and the list goes on.

The paper makes significant insights into how self-reflection in regard to learning may actually improve one’s understanding of what they are learning.

In contrast, learning without reflection on the subject matter seems to inhibit the learning process and children retain less information.

By reflecting on their own learning process, children can identify the areas they need to improve and set goals for themselves to achieve better grades academically. This can help them develop a growth mindset, which can persist through to adulthood.

Understanding others

When children reflect on the feedback that they receive, they start growing self-awareness.

This self-awareness can be a powerful tool for helping children understand others, as it enables them to better understand their own thoughts, feelings, and behavior, and how these are affected by different situations.

They learn to identify and understand the emotions of others through empathy and perspective-taking as well as building stronger relationships through conflict resolution. 

Emotional Intelligence

Self-reflection can also help children develop emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence is the ability to understand and especially manage one's own emotions.

By reflecting on their own feelings, children can learn to identify and express their emotions in healthy ways and to understand and respond appropriately to the emotions of others.

This can help them build stronger relationships, and cope better with the challenges of growing up.

Teaching self-reflection

Teaching self-reflection in children can be done in a variety of ways, depending on the child's age and level of development. Here are a few strategies that can be used to help children develop such skills:

1. Modeling self-reflection: Children learn by example, so it is important for adults to model self-reflection in their own behavior. This can include talking about your own thoughts and feelings, and explaining how you have used self-reflection to solve problems or make decisions.

2. Encourage journaling: Encourage children to keep a journal where they can write down their thoughts and feelings. This can be a private space for children to reflect on their experiences and emotions.

3. Use open-ended questions: Instead of asking closed-ended questions, use open-ended questions that encourage children to think critically and reflect on their own experiences. For example, instead of asking "Did you have a good day at school?" ask "What did you learn today?"

4. Use art and play therapy: Art and play therapy can be used to help children express their thoughts and feelings in a non-verbal way. Children can use art materials to create pictures, drawings, or other forms of self-expression.

5. Create opportunities for self-reflection: Create opportunities for children to reflect on their own behavior, such as after-school discussions or "thinking time" where children are encouraged to reflect on their actions and decisions during the day.

6. Encourage children to reflect on their own learning process: Help children to understand that learning is a lifelong process and that self-reflection is an essential part of it. Encourage children to reflect on their own learning process and help them to set goals for themselves to achieve better results.

7. Be supportive: Be supportive and understanding when children share their thoughts and feelings, and provide guidance and feedback when they need it.

Closing thoughts

Self-reflection is a wonderful tool at the disposal of anyone willing to use it. It's important to remember that self-reflection is a skill that takes time to develop.

Start small, and be patient as children learn to reflect on their own thoughts and feelings. Encouraging children to reflect on their own thoughts, feelings, and behavior can help them build strong relationships and navigate the challenges of growing up.

Teachers and parents can help children develop this skill by providing a safe and supportive environment for them to explore their own thoughts and feelings.

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom” - Aristotle