Children simultaneously grow up in multiple environments. From engaging with their peers in the classroom to their family at home, they become more aware of their individuality and may even develop multiple social identities. Different forms of identity may also arise. Over time, children can develop a sense of gender identity, cultural identity, or even an identity based on their hobbies and roles. Additionally, children who grow up with more than one cultural background, for example, can sometimes feel like they belong in two separate worlds. Faced with disparate cultural traditions on different sides of the family, they may feel like they don’t fit in. Thus, in a world that’s becoming more interconnected, it’s increasingly important to acknowledge and support the multifaceted development of a child’s identity. Here are 5 ways you can try embracing your youth’s identity:

1. Talk about what identity means

   Have a discussion with your youth about what identity means. There are many types of identity that can arise from the environment your youth interacts with and the roles they have. To get started, discuss how family, hobbies, gender, race, and ability intersect with and contribute to their understanding of identity. Youth also enjoy hearing about your experiences growing up, so sharing your own experiences is another great way to get the conversation started.

2. Embrace uniqueness

   It can be challenging to balance a youth’s inherent desire to fit in with their peers while exploring their individuality. Talk about some unique attributes of your child’s friends and what makes your child unique.

3. Encourage self-exploration

   Taking your youth to interesting places and trying new activities with them is one way you can encourage your youth to try new things. When an adult is engaged with youth, they show that they are engaged and excited in the activity, so kids pay more attention and like the activity even more. Ask open-ended questions during the activity to encourage more engagement. After, reflect on the experience. Start the conversation by asking, “How do you feel?”, “What are some of your biggest strengths?”, “What were some challenges you encountered?”

4. Understand stereotyping and bias

   Unfortunately, youth will eventually experience discrimination in some form. Whether it’s an overt comment or passive aggression, fostering a positive conversation about identity builds stronger self-esteem that can protect your child from these instances.

   If your child ever feels discriminated against…

   • Provide empathy and compassion. Let them express their emotions, and acknowledge them as valid. Reassure them that it’s not their fault.

   • Answer questions at an age-appropriate level

   • Remind them of their strength and the beauty of their uniqueness

   It’s also crucial to start a conversation about stereotyping and bias early on. In fact, avoiding the topic altogether can imply that differences in identity are taboo.

   • Teach them what stereotypes are. Stereotypes are widely held beliefs that are often applied to groups of people who share similar characteristics. They often overlook individual differences, and encourage people to make assumptions about others they don’t know

   • Ask your child what they have heard, and explain any myths

   • Watch your own words and actions that can imply discrimination. Youth often model their own behavior and beliefs after their parents and other guardians

5. Find ways to celebrate your youth and their chosen identity

   Understand that it’s normal for youth to experience identity struggles if they’re questioned or teased by peers. Help them see the importance of their values and beliefs, and teach them that these facets of identity should be cherished and protected. At the end of the day, accepting your youth for who they are is far more important than a label.